Training for the mountain climb last fall, I managed one time running around the track, followed by several times around walking. Then one more running, and several times walking again-- over and over. As I near the end of each running lap, everything in me feels relief, knowing in a few more steps I can walk again.
My trainer, Jesse, tells me "little and often makes much," and we continue our routine.
Why is this so difficult? Furthermore, the track at my gym is small--twelve times around makes a mile, not four times as a traditional track! The fear I face after one-twelfth of a mile, is all about my breathing. Feet are fine, legs fine, everything else fine, but I feel like I can't breathe unless I slow down to a walk. Obviously I've never been a runner.
I don't mind being pushed in a workout on the bike, or the rowing machine, or doing lunges, squats, or planks. Push away! I don't mind sweating and I am fine with, "just three more..," when I think I can't do another one. But PLEASE don't make me run more than one time around the track.
In the last few weeks Jesse has occasionally extended our one-lap runs, to one and a half laps. Occasionally I groan my disapproval when I realize we are not stopping in the usual place. I gear up, knowing I won't die, but surely feeling miserable, as I continue the extra half a lap.
Little and often makes much.
Today he extended those one and a half laps to two. Yes, the body of a non-runner who thinks it's impossible to breathe after one lap, carried me to the end of two laps, more walking in between, then two laps again...and again.....and again.
My method of coping is to remain oblivious! Since my mind and emotions haven't caught up to my body yet, I make the decision to turn them off for the workout. Somehow if I become unaware of the fact I'm running two laps, then everything will be alright. At least this is the rationale of my lagging-behind mind.
Writing it out, I now realize I was fooling myself -- one last effort to remain the "old me," the non-runner. The truth is, I of course was very aware I was running the complete two laps.
My body ran ahead of my mind, leaving behind all my objections.
And that is the power of doing things constantly... It’s part of your life. It’s so melted into your existence that it doesn’t really show up anymore. You can’t say it’s there, but you're doing it. Quote from blogger, D. Roua
Little and often makes much.
Slowly and surely,
"I am a runner,"
is melting into my existence.
Meals:
Turkey Meatloaf Sandwich on whole grain "thins", Spinach & Tomato
1/2 Yukon Gold Potato, 1 oz. reduced-fat cheddar, Black Beans & Salsa
Snacks:
Almonds
Strawberry/Banana "Ice Cream"--homemade, the only two ingredients are strawberries and bananas
Pomegranate Juice with carbonated water (Carbonation made with Harold's Christmas present!)
Workouts:
One hour personal training session.
"Group Core" class
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