“I would not give a fig for the simplicity on this side of complexity, but I would give my life for the simplicity on the other side of complexity.”

                                                               ~~Oliver Wendell Holmes


Smiling, my small group athletic trainer Peter, declared,
"You're taking a complex approach to your training!"

"Yes I am," I answered.  "My complex approach is that I am fine!"

We laughed over our exchange as Jesse and I prepared to go to work this morning.

On Saturday I had gone all-out through Peter's circuits, in spite of several stations including twisting moves.  On Monday morning he asked how I was feeling and I mentioned a little bit of spasm activity going on mid-back, but thought it was getting better.  Then I proceeded to spin class, followed by an hour of step class, after which I felt great!

As soon as I saw Peter this morning, I made sure to let him know there will be no need for modifications in class on Saturday.  His comment about my "complex approach" to my training may have referred to my different workouts he'd observed, but I chose to make light of the comment, to keep it simple.

After working through everything this month, on the other side of my complexity...

I'm working.
I'm fine.

~~~~~~~~~

--Broke through a self-imposed limit running with Jesse this morning. Yes!
--Looking forward to 4:15 step/power/balance & flexibility workout
  this afternoon.

Still thoroughly enjoying the Blueberry Chia Seed Jam (recipe in previous blog entry.)

Part 6 & 7, Short and Sweet!

#6  What's Next
#7  Do I Give Up This Crazy Dream?

************

#6 Answer:  Work
#7 Answer:  What kind of a question is that?

I have the fever now! 

The fall weather, inspiration from friend Scott Stanley's fantastic win in a Dallas tower this last weekend, Jesse leaves in a few days for  L.A.'s U.S. Bank climb... 
energy creating energy...I'm pumped!

In my second week of two-a-day workouts, and wanting more.

The dream has only just begun.

*********

 

 

Delicious, Super-Easy 

 

Blueberry Chia Seed Jam

 

Serve on your favorite toast (mine is Ezekiel 7 Sprouted Grains),
pancakes, oatmeal, yogurt, healthy muffins...
so many options...
great right out of the jar!

Blend the juice of 4 oranges,
with 1 1/2 cups blueberries,
then shake vigorously after adding 7 teaspoons of chia seeds.

Cover in glass jars and chill in refrigerator. 
After 15 minutes, stir briskly,
then maybe once more about 10 minutes later. 

The next day you have a wonderful fresh-fruit, chia seed  jam. 

(Recipe from "The Facelift Diet" on Facebook.)

The Big Question -- Part 5

1) Why am I doing this?
2) What trips me up?
3) Is it even possible to do better?
4) Am I capable of doing more, faster?
5) What makes me stop?
6) What's next?
7) Do I give up this crazy dream?



Quick answer:  I haven't put in enough work...trained hard enough.   Extreme success requires extreme preparation!



Longer, contemplative answer:

A recent Facebook message queries, "Tell me, what seems to hold you back? Do your legs tire, or does your cardiovascular system get overloaded?"

I click inside the "Reply" box, but have no answer for the keyboard.  I think, well of course it's my cardiovascular system. However, this year, I'm stronger in that area than last. I stop on the stairwell less frequently, therefore my legs are feeling new levels of stress.  I go back and forth, but formulate no reply.

The questions follow me over the next few days, evolving into one issue,
"What makes me stop?"

I stop following a healthy eating plan each time I reach a weight goal.
I stop writing, sometimes for a few days, others, months at a time.
I stop trying to get my book published.
I stop building my client base...
Stop. Stop. Stop.

In addition to these areas, even the very physical act of raising one foot in front of the other, climbing a flight of stairs, is stopped by doubts and fear.

That's what holds me back.

My doubts arise from self-judgement.  

I tighten in fear of my cardiovascular system failing me.  
I doubt the strength of my legs which have always taken me readily to the top in the past. 

At the beginning of a stair climb, joyful exhilaration blocks out the negatives.  Fear can only exist when joy leaves the stairwell.  

Perhaps joy is too much to ask at floor fifty-nine, seventy-nine or eighty-nine...
To keep pushing hard at those points? 
To keep going then? 
Time for faith. Time for grace. 
Time to find every positive inner resource possible,
to replace any doubts or fear.

I have a lot to learn.  I suspect athletes develop this positive mental attitude over years of training and performance.

Each challenge is an open possibility and I get to determine the outcome.

I determine it by my choices of food to fuel my body, the amount of rest I get, how much water I drink, my training, my workouts, my trust, my faith and my vision.

If I climb with the (borrowed from Scott Jurick) mantra, "This is what I came for," each step is my opportunity to reach new heights.

If  3  is who I am,  1  +  2  =  3

1.  Put in the work.
2.  Believe and stay positive.
 
In Rich Roll's book, Finding Ultra, his wife's words of encouragement at the start of his five marathons in five days:
"Remember it's already done;
all you have to do is show up,
stay present
and show us who you really are."

********

100% Positive Experience, every step of the way,
climbing Cathedral Rock Trail last October with friends and family.

 

"Faster?" Part 4

1) Why am I doing this?
2) What trips me up?
3) Is it even possible to do better?
4) Am I capable of doing more, faster?
5) What makes me stop?
6) What's next?
7) Do I give up this crazy dream?

Continuing to explore these questions in reference to my pursuit of stair climbing:
 
Sixty years old, no background in fitness or athletic activities, diagnosed five years ago with a degenerative arthritis called Facet Joint Disease, as well as ten years ago with holes in my bronchial tubes causing Irreversible Airways Disease, I ask the question, "Am I capable of climbing faster?"
 
I do not need expert medical opinion, professional fitness advice, or age-related possibility studies in order to answer this question.
 
I need only one thing.  Honesty.
 
If I'm honest,  I recognize my body fat percentage is way too high. 
 

Biggest bottom line,

all else aside...

when I lose fifteen pounds, there is no doubt whatsoever,

I will be faster on the stairs.

 

********

 
Now for the "asides" --
 
1)  Five years ago I awoke in pain every morning, had great difficulty reaching down to step into a pair of pants.  I walked through airports after a flight, very slowly, all bent over.  At baggage claim, I had to sit waiting, while someone else retrieved my luggage.  Advil, muscle relaxers and pain medication were staples.

Research on my diagnosis said it would get worse over time, and the only thing available for it would be pain control once the pain became unbearable (like a shot directly into your spine!)

No.

For four years I worked to strengthen everything around the middle and lower spine problem areas. I lost 50 pounds.  My self-prescribed treatment plan was training in the gym, private Pilates sessions, regular chiropractic adjustments and deep tissue massage, rounded out by believing I would get better and better.  To make it happen, I set goals I'd never even contemplated when I was much younger, and I met them.
 
Today I go to bed and wake up the next day, pain free. I travel alone when necessary, walking briskly and confidently through airports, easily retrieving my own luggage! 

I climb stairs in 90+ floor towers.  I feel fantastic afterward!

Advil? Only on a rare occasion.  Now, the only time I'm aware the problem exists, is when I do not use my core and other muscles optimally in specific types of twisting motions, or on elevation.  Period.

So much for degenerative! 

2)  The Irreversible Airways Disease is a little trickier.
Currently I haven't worked up to running one mile yet without stopping. I am finally able to keep running for 8 -10 minutes at a time though.  That's huge for me!  When I'm discouraged, Jesse simply says, "You have to learn to crawl before you can walk," and we keep plugging away.

Also, currently I stop every 15 to 20 floors on a stair climb, double over and quickly use self-hypnosis techniques to calm my desperate gasps for air.  This slows me down. This year we are working on moving to a place where I do not have to stop. 

3)  Age...irrelevant.  Too many examples out there of men and women in their sixties and older, performing at incredible levels.  In Born to Run, Christopher McDougall explains that long distance runners reach their peak at age 64!

4) A lifetime of unhealthy patterns in the areas of diet and exercise must all be shifted.  I progress, I regress.  My biggest frontier is in the area of diet.   A work in progress.  When it's conquered, the 15 pounds will be gone, and  I will be faster.

Next question please.

With Jesse
June 2012

 

Is It Even Possible To Do Better? -- Part 3

From self-help, motivational, and inspirational speakers, books, and programs, to the enormous weight loss industry; from fitness instructors and trainers, to counselors and therapists, teachers and coaches, to schools, religions, and sciences--we are an industrious people who count on the premise that one can do better. We preach it, we sell it, we buy it.  A part of each heartbeat hints our possibilities, like a clock ticking relentlessly.  We can tune it out, or we can listen, and act, before our time runs out.

 

When my times in the stairwell aren't improving, discouraged, I ask the question.  When I revert to former, uninspired ways, I ask the question. When I do not see the progress I'd hoped to see, I ask the question, "Is it even possible to do better?"

 

Then the answers come flying in, like special messenger doves.  I remove the pigeon posts--small tubes--from their legs and extract the light, thin, rolled-up paper. Spreading it open between my fingers, I read the first one:

 

 

Then the second:

 

 

And the third:

 

 

 

Well, OK, they found their way to me from the Internet. Technically there were no messenger doves.

 

Refusing to let doubts sap anymore energy, I accept who I am, and where I am in this process.  It may not be where I envisioned six months ago, so I adjust.  It's my journey. I accept. I forgive. I move on.

 

Having asked the question, the answer I already knew is affirmed. 

 

I sing my song: 

 

"I may not be there yet, but I'm closer than I was yesterday."

 

 

 

Yes, I can do better.

 

 

 

P.S.  This morning Jesse (my trainer) shared an inspiration from a recent sermon he heard about change. A piece of it served as one more messenger dove today.  Paraphrased:  If you keep getting on the blue line (one of Chicago's transit rail lines) you can never reach a destination which is only served by the green line! 

 

I've switched tracks...TODAY began my two-a-day workouts, leading up to November 4th.  First one was at 8:45 a.m. Sure felt good when the second one was over at 7 p.m. tonight!

 

 

 

**********

 

 

 

 

Photos from moments of anticipation before a climb:

 

Getting in line at the John Hancock building.   2/12

 

Leaving for the cab over to the Stratosphere.  3/12

 

Thrilled at the surprise shirts my family wore ("Team Cheryl") to support my climb.  2/11

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 



Listening To An Inner Voice, Part 2

1)  Why am I doing this?
2)  What trips me up?
3)  Is it even possible to do better?
4)  Am I capable of doing more, faster?
5)  What makes me stop?
6)  What's next?
7)  Do I give up this crazy dream?


Recently my inner voice has been racing from thought to thought so furiously fast I can't keep up!  Time to jump onto the moving train and answer Part 2's question, "What trips me up?"

My opposite of  tripped up :

Everything flowing smoothly, 

keeping a good balance, 

moving forward 

without hesitation or interruption.

Examples from the kitchen...

Preparation
--I reach for a baggie to store some dripping leftover, and there are plenty at my fingertips. I need a colander to strain cooked apples once a year and find it instantly in the back of a cupboard. Or, the avocado peeled is every bit of prime ripened creaminess I hoped it would be.
--Each necessary ingredient comes together for a new recipe.

Pace
--The blender purrs along till my smoothie is perfect, no frozen fruit or too-powdery blade jams.
--Menu items for a meal, finish to completion and are ready to serve at the exact same time.

Examples from writing...

Desire  
--I want to do this.
Ease 
--I simply start, continue, adjust, organize, and finish satisfied.
Inner good feeling 
--I'm in the exact right spot, in line with my voice, time, space, and subconscious, allowing discovery.
Learning  
At the conclusion, I know something I did not know when I began.


On The Stairs:

Preparation  
--Proper training and nutrition, clothing, shoes, and I-pod if allowed. Rested and hydrated.
Pace  
--Not starting out too fast, knowing my times at each quarter of the race.
--Having a floor near the end of the race where I plan to push harder.
Desire
--Totally pumped!  Excited, ready to experience what I prepared for, along with all the climbers around me also looking forward to the climb. Indeed, desire mixed with adrenaline...I want to do this!
Ease
--I have a plan, I begin, move forward, making adjustments when necessary, and finish on top of the world...high as can be!
Inner good feeling
--In a place I've never been before, doing something in my past I never dreamed I'd do, giving my subconscious a repetitive job it loves, supported, pushing boundaries, breaking free.
Learning
--Always a unique climb, much to learn about what I'm capable of or not, and what I can work to achieve on the next one.  I know new levels of gratitude and what it means to be alive.

"What trips me up?"
The opposite of all the above!


Question #5 will explore these more deeply. 
For now, Question #2,  here's the list...

...the unbalancing, hesitation causing, 

stagnant non-flowing things that can trip me up:

Not sticking to the training plan. 

Eating sugar. 

Not getting enough rest or drinking enough water.

Starting out too fast. 

Losing track of my time. 

Thinking I don't have the energy left to make a push at the end.

Doubts. 

Fears. 

Not adhering to my plan. 

Forgetting to appreciate my unique opportunity.

Closing in and closing down, instead of opening to all the possibility.

A more realistic end-of-race photo!

Listening To An Inner Voice -- Part 1

I'm on a journey to discover what it's like to realize potential with my body, in pursuit of the physical activity of stair climbing.

The following questions are swirling furiously. Time to write lest they suffocate my next steps.

1)  Why am I doing this?
2)  What trips me up?
3)  Is it even possible to do better?
4)  Am I capable of doing more, faster?
5)  What makes me stop?
6)  What's next?
7)  Do I give up this crazy dream?

I experienced success over the years in creative endeavors, from piano performance, photography, and writing, to ensemble performance, decorating, and painting.  With my husband I raised three children who are now creative, wise, working, caring, talented adults.

In the work force I successfully contributed to the growth of one non-profit by designing and publishing newsletters, maintaining donor communication, budget planning and bookkeeping.  Another non-profit used my administrative skills as its program director.  

In education I introduced music into the lives of countless young school students, and I nurtured many at the piano from very young beginnings to their accomplished recitals performing Bach, Beethoven, and Chopin for audiences who were moved by their artistry.  Under an Annenberg grant, I created curriculum and trained teachers for an innovative program which uses music to encourage early childhood reading in inner city classrooms.

Do I really need to be doing this now? Climbing stairs?

After early retirement I dabbled in creative activities, growing content...for awhile. I always trusted my instincts, which rarely disappoint me.  One day I imagined I might be a good hypnotherapist, proceeded through the training, and since then have a deepened awareness and trust in my intuition. 

Our subconscious runs our lives.  However, we continually have the option to let all our old patterns dictate our behavior, reactions, and feelings, or, we have the option to shift these patterns.  We can move through our lives never quieting enough to hear the small voice within, or, we can be still, ask the questions and listen for the answers.

Sluggish and overweight for 14 years, by age 57 I found myself in the gym for the first time.  Previously it seemed I only moved for survival--never for recreation, never for competition, and certainly never to realize a dream!  (With the exception of one 5K running experience in college which I wrote about in a previous blog entry:  http://steppingupwithstoriesanddreams.blogspot.com/2012/01/time-to-run-season-for-every-activity.html )

What I did not write about that experience, was a remark by a boyfriend, as four of us sat around a celebratory dinner table. I wasn't hungry after my first time ever running three miles, so I declined to eat.  At dessert time I decided to have a piece of apple pie. While enjoying each bite, he said something to the effect of, "Cheryl will run three miles for a piece of apple pie!"

Perhaps it sounds harmless now, but at the time, his remark cut through the celebration, suddenly halting the good feelings I had about my race.  Instead, the message I heard was, there's something wrong with me.  Thus marked the beginning and the end of any athletic pursuit. 

After two years in the gym periodically, from age 57 to 59, I decided it was time to entertain a game-changer.  Until then, my gym work involved learning how to move, period!  From 59 to 60, my goal was preparing to climb a small mountain on my sixtieth birthday.  During that year, I discovered tower races, participating in my first stair climb-- a half-climb up the John Hancock building.

Age 60 brought five full stair climbs. My times improved with each one.

I no longer simply want to finish a climb.  I no longer simply want to improve in tiny increments.  My desire is to compete.

I have no athletic background.
I have no base of fitness to build on.
It's a daunting challenge to go from point A, the beginning, to point B, realizing my goal.

The women who win the top spots in my age group for each race, have backgrounds as fitness instructors and marathon runners, often having multiple triathlons under their belt. I know because I've researched who they are.

This could take awhile.

Back to the first question: "Why am I doing this?"

I believe I have untapped potential.

 

I love discovery,

and want to discover everything there is about becoming fit,

taking care of my health, pursuing an athletic quest,

pushing myself...

 

I want to keep learning.

 

I want to go

where I've never gone before.

 

I want to be judgement-free.

 

I want to be free.

 

Tomorrow, question two, "What trips me up?"




The Best Feeling